Wow, this sub just never ceases to amaze me. This just might be the worst post yet. Is this supposed to be funny? Because it just isn’t. How can you honestly sit there and tell me music hasn’t been going downhill since Queen (RIP Freddy Mercury). Do you even know what real music is? All this shit about mom’s lasagna and ladybugs is just complete and utter garbage. You hear songs from the 60s and 70s that are still so iconic they are featured all the time. Today’s music just doesn’t have that staying power. It is just formulaic filth that panders to whatever today’s youth is into. You think you can honestly sit there and tell me people will still be listening to Katy Perry and Nicki Minaj 30 years from now? Yeah fucking right. You still hear we are the champions by queen at every single sporting even in the world. No song made today will last anywhere close to that long. And where’s the emotion? Where’s the feeling? Back in my day artists actually put thought into what they wrote. And that’s just it. Today’s artists don’t even write their own songs anymore. They get some guy with a degree in bullshit who makes money engineering these meaningless but catchy songs that rake in millions only because the record companies are forcing radio stations to play them every ten seconds to get them stuck in people’s heads so that is all they can think of. This simply didn’t happen in the 70s. People made songs based on how they were feeling. And guess what, their music also had impacts on what was going on in the world. You guys have probably never heard of him, but there was this indie guy named John Lennon who wrote a song about imagining the world without any violence. Now that’s the type of stuff we need in today’s music. Something to inspire the youth to do something good. That’s why kids are always getting in so much trouble now. The music is telling them to fuck everything that moves and beat the shit out of each other. So they do it. No questions asked.
And don’t even get me started on today’s celebrity worship. Do we really need to know every time Kim Kardashian is taking a shit? Seriously, who gives a fuck what those idiots are doing. Why are they even famous in the first place? And all this obsession with technology is driving us into idiots. You see with the most recent facebook scandal how easy it is for them to manipulate you. Do you guys even realize that facebook was designed for college students? Anyone under the age of 18 should not be allowed on it. Simple as that. I think you should be required to register with a .edu email when creating an account. That also keeps out the idiots that can’t get into college and the poor people that can’t afford it. And back in my day we didn’t even need facebook, if you wanted to contact someone, you had to call their house. And guess what, if they weren’t home, you didn’t talk to them. We also had to memorize each others phone numbers by heart. Kids these days have it too easy putting everyone’s numbers in their phones. And twitter is even worse. #what is the point of these things? Seriously, I don’t get it. They are just made up catchphrases that make you sound stupid. And what is with advertisers trying to get me to use them? Like when a couple guys are going hiking and spot some wildlife and you see #ladybugs. Stop popping those things up in the middle of my show. I don’t fucking care!
Now I know you guys all agree with everything I just said but are going to down vote me anyway to try and fit in with the group. And that’s fine. But listen to this first. Today’s music is ruining this planet. Pretty soon there will be riots in the streets that will make Rodney king Dwarf in comparison. Freddy Mercury will rise from the dead and lead the charge in murdering Mark Zuckerberg, the Kardashians, Justin Bieber, and every other trendy celebrity that is ruining the youths. It will be called “the modern cleansing where a new renaissance will emerge. We will see Davinci and Michelangelo rise again and bring new artistic beauty in this world. And you will all see just how bad it really was.