I want him to propose so we can get married. Really I would like to get married early/middle next year since we're planning to move on to our next steps at the end of next year. I am settling and pretty much throwing my hands up. I'm not settling when it comes to him. But I am settling on the wedding because it is coming too late for me. When we talked about getting married February of last year, he implied he would be proposing by August. November came and he didn't, and I asked what he was thinking and the plan was to get engaged by February at that point. It's April and hasn't happened. I've been watching my friend get engaged and plan their wedding this whole time after dating for a year and as silly as it seems to all of you, it has bothered me. Because when we originally talked, the timeframe would have made so that I was getting married around the same time as my friends and it was going to be fun to plan with them. He's not into planning weddings and I don't have a lot of family around so now I'm pretty much going to be planning by myself if we have a wedding and it's a big disappointment. I know what I could have had and at I can get isn't the same so I would rather not spend the money on it. I get that most people don't see it that way but that's the way I am.

As far as what my boyfriend wants, I don't know at this point. From past conversations, he wanted to get married. He was excited to start a family eventually. We've still been discussing the move we plan to make and the timing of our careers and kids so it doesn't seem like he doesn't want to be with me anymore but I really don't know where he's going with the engagement. My concern is that if I ask him, he's going to propose only because of the pressure and I don't want that hanging over me.