My girlfriend has diagnosed depression and social anxiety disorder. It got really bad when she was in her early teens, 12-15 I think was the worst of it. She attempted suicide, and was actually in an in-patient thing at a children's center.
She was on various meds for years but none of them treated her well, except Wellbutrin which she finalized on. She was on that for years, including when I met her. For a reason I dont remember they upped the dosage suddenly, and it caused a seizure when she was at the beach and she almost died from drowning. They took her off it cold turkey, big dose to zero in one day... yeah her entire brain and mood crashed and didnt even out for a few months. She's now off meds for the past few years, but at the moment trying to get back on a smaller dose of Wellbutrin because it does help to take the edge off the valleys in her moods. The depression is less deep and she rebounds quicker.
The point: We've been together over 6 years now and when I met her I didnt really know clinical depression or anxiety. I made a lot of mistakes handling things different ways, and got really really hurt by things she has said to me over the course of our relationship. I just kind of bottled it up at first, but in our time together I've seen her worst and best, and I've learned so much.
I love her so so unbelievably much, and over 6 years I've realized that like any mental illness, she will have bad days and might say something hurtful. Part of what I've accepted in being her partner is being able to absorb that and take it in stride. I do not see it as abuse, but as a symptom of her disorder. She is such a sweet girl, and I can tell her apart from her disease and I could never leave her for her disability.
Because I love her, when her disorders are eating at her, it makes me want to reach out and heal her, comfort her and support her, not leave her... if that makes any sense. I cant speak for anyone but myself, however I know what love is and I love this person in every sense of the word, and I'd never in my life leave her standing.