much love to you all, fellow depressive humans.

Going on about 4 years free of the clinical worst of my depression (you know... where it's so bad that mere speech can feel like too much to ask and your limbs are like lead all the time), but the naps are still a thing on really low days.

The difference now is I've learned to insist on accepting the love and care I owe to myself, even when the motivation seems absent. That commitment means managing to do just three basic things every day that help the brain and body to stay relatively healthy so I don't feel as much like killing myself. I kind of started doing them one at a time, gradually. Those three things are:

-- at least one tall glass of water and one meal of real, nutritious food, i.e. fresh fruit or vegetables, protein, essential fatty acids... -- every day, rain or shine, dress for the weather and take a walk outside, 10 to 30 minutes. sunlight, fresh air, circulation, and stimulation. you NEED all of these things. no joke. -- lastly, try to get at least 7hrs of sleep (sleep gets easier if you develop a calming bedtime routine... for real, neurological studies support this. even if you're not always going to bed at the same time, a routine signals to your brain/body that it's time to quiet down and start producing the appropriate chemicals for sleep. my personal routine is just to wipe my face, brush my teeth, make a hot cup of herbal tea, and strip down/climb in bed while it brews. then of course hop on Reddit or read a book. most nights now I pass out before I ever finish drinking it)

These things started as chores, but are now bare minimums which I often blow right past. Focusing on essential aspects of my health has enabled me to slowly begin the more challenging journey of rebuilding the sense of self and identity and purpose that depression is so efficient at robbing from people. In order to be content and happy again, that's the road we have to travel. Take care of yourselves! At least one person is rooting for you :)