Got a family member like this.

She's never made any effort to educate herself either though school or just reading something other than gossip mags, but is the unassailable authority on any subject.

She's also just got a job for the first time in her life (she's 50 something) and thinks she's a bad ass now and always goes on about how hard she works. Which is about twenty hours a week doing admin in an old folks home. Okay good for you, but uncle X has worked fifty hours a week for 25 years as a mechanic and we don't hear him complaining.. 'Oh that's easy in my job I've got to blah blah blah'

She argues with me about food even though I was a chef for 15 years. Dumb stuff like salt being toxic. Just ... fuck. She'll also back seat drive me when I'm cooking meals for the family. Tell me things are done when they aren't. Tells me to cook things more when they are done. She thinks seared tuna should be pink and hot in the middle. Doesn't seem to understand that making it hot cooks it and you can't physically have both. 'What did they teach you cooking school anyway? I had it like that in France'

No. No you didn't.

Oh yeah and France. Paris is too old fashioned. So if you Frenchies could just demolish it and start again that would really please my Aunt. More malls and parking this time please and less faggoty churches.

...and she's really into homeopathy, diets and health. Except that she's not very healthy herself. I recently shed a few pounds and was getting some words of praise from the other family and they were asking me what I've been doing and I tell them I've just been eating better and running a little. 'Running doesn't do anything. That's a myth'

Share your health secrets with us please so I too can be overweight and addicted to painkillers.

What else? That's right, you shouldn't take children to Indonesia because the Muslims steal white babies. This was to a young couple who had just gone to Bali with their one year old and in front of my lovely Iranian uncle who just chuckled away the awkwardness. Maybe he was planning to steal their baby and she rumbled him?

Sigh.

Sorry, had to rant.