There's no dream college. I spent my whole 4 years of community college in this cycle:

• apply to universities as a transfer student

• get accepted

• realize i can't afford it

• realize I'm stuck here

• get depressed

It wasn't about education, because my department was really good. I just thought I wouldn't be able to "find myself" or be in a good social atmosphere, or whatever college feels like it's supposed to be about (besides education...). It didn't occur to me until afterwards that college felt so empty because I was a recluse, actively hated where I was, and had terrible mental health.

Nothing's ever going to be as good as the shit you daydream about, so stop daydreaming and start being active in your life. And get a therapist.