That I'm a loser who hates himself just because I'm unable to see through all the negative thoughts, emotions and bad experiences I've had since growing up. Nobody feels sorry for your bum ass expect you in the end. Don't waste your life on silly time wasters just because your afraid of putting yourselves in challenging positions. Let it fuel you what you did just to make the day more bearable. Don't go around daydreaming about that high-school gf who loved to suck even minutes after Nutting your entire heritage/DNA, it's better to be sucked clean than to not have it drained like the freshwater in CA. What others think of you, quite frankly the person you conversate, or just exchanged a random eye contact is more occupied in a random often insecure thought about themselves. The world sure as hell don't evolve around you either. People only care about the mselves most of time so don't let a bad experience of a inept caveman let things fuck your mojo. You don't half ass and give everything, you da boss in most peoples eyes.

Maybe this will help some people of getting out of the self loathing circle of fuck all good. I'm not going to say the first steps of just simple routine will change your life because it won't. Beat that sucker with discipline and the motivation will come as a bieffect. Everyone has that small thing that keeps them going, a small kick like morning sex with the loved one, or just a angsty jogg or maybe your morning pill. Don't lose sight of what's important :). Self loathing just leads to anxiety and even more. We are after all apes with wicked tech no man who walked this earth before us ever fucking dreamed of. //Drunk incoherent rambling of a drunk Swede hope this reaches to some of you, and makes some sense :).