I should point out that my comment on masking doesn't rely on my personal experience to be true

Mine does. Because I was diagnosed young. I also have dealt with being an outcast, bullying. All the things you mention.

I'm making a very long answer cause I know people in this subreddit love to bully self diagnosed people (which I'm very much not in favor off)

I have found it to be opposite on subreddits made for people who are Autistic. I made a throwaway since some people know mine, and every autistic website and space is overran with self diagnosed people, and lord forbid you say you want to hear from those who are diagnosed. They turn against you like you've slapped their grandma. They all stomped all over everything I had to say, and acted like they knew how I felt. I felt like a complete outcast on spaces made for me.