My first boyfriend/love and I broke up about six months ago, but continued to hook up until about three months ago. I found out he was also hooking up with another girl, the girl he's now dating.

After we broke up I had all the stereotypical feeling you hear about. I would watch his social media and take any chance I could to talk to him. I would get my feelings hurt over everything I saw, and I didn't understand how he was so casual with me when he had been "in love" with me just weeks before. It felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest, but he was carrying on just fine.

It took time, but I finally realized that being angry and upset was only hurting me. I am never going to get that apology, and he's never going to realize he wants me back. And, honestly, why the fuck did I want him so bad? Why do I want someone who makes me feel this way?

From there on I literally started tricking my brain into thinking I did not care about him. I'm pregnant, so I could not cut him out completely, but I got as close as possible. When he tried to chat I told him I didn't want to. It wasn't about putting up a front to make him miss me, but to make it very clear that all conversation would be about our son. Other than than that we don't talk. It was difficult but I started intentionally not posting to social media. I didn't want to wonder if he saw it, or just do things for him to find out. So then I wasn't doing things with him in mind, I was just doing it for me.

And I feel SO MUCH BETTER. He no longer consumes my thoughts or feelings. I don't do things with the intention of him seeing. I've started talking to a really great guy who makes me very happy and treats me really well.

I know that was a lot, but I just wanted to show that it does actually get better. Eventually it will not feel like a 50lb weight is on your chest. Yes, you will probably always care about him, but it will be in passing.