Sorry to be That Person, you seem nice and I mean no offence, but...

I don't purposely separate myself from stuff. It's not done intentionally, so when I have all these people accusing me of deliberately trying to be "unique", I genuinely don't understand it.

Isn't individuation an absolutely key part of what it means to be a 4? Every type wants to be free to be themselves or be authentic, whatever that means. But 4s are a type that will, on some level, absolutely feel contempt or disdain for what is common, and feel an intense need to try to manifest their hyper-specific sense of identity in reality... and if it's not different than everyone, it's not authentic enough, hence the envy (here's a source that talks about it, highly recommended).

I promise that I come in peace, and I will upvote both of your comments as a show of good faith! But I'm writing this because there's a lot of conflicting information about the 4, so it's really important to be clear on what a 4 is and isn't. I don't know you, people are complex, etc. BUT the type is the type, and not relating to a really key part of the type's architecture is a signal that you may find it helpful to consider other possible core types.