I hate when shit like this comes up because people will bring up the entirety of racial injustice and come down with the full force of it on a person who literally didn't mean any harm. It's like "Is my grandma an asshole for playfully joking with our neighbor, who happens to be black, by shaking her cane at him?"

And people responding "yes! She's super racist, remember Rodney King!? Also PoC get beaten by cops all the time so that was totally out of line!!!"

Like ????? OP literally sent a photo she thought looked like her future DIL. Didn't mention her race, no history of racist comments, just a photo she thought looked like her. DIL is entitled not to like it and ask her to stop, but to accuse her of being a racist because she's incapable of viewing an an issue on it's own merit is crazy.