93yr old Gma passed away 2 days ago. Everyone was there at the hospital. I got a text I missed at 4am, called at 8am and got to say hi. Sped from Omaha to the hospital 3 hours away. Met with everyone and she was in rough shape. It was ab-so-fucking-lutely the roughest thing to ever experience. My Gpa is still in pretty good shape physically at 90, but he has a 2-3 minute memory span. We sat for hours as he re-lived this over and over. He kept asking what brought this on, etc. This guy is a tough old bird. Luckily he would go from sheer agony to cracking hilarious 1 liners (for the minutes he thought she was just sick).

Now I'd love to go surrounded by loved ones. And that is probably the absolutely best way to go. But I've always been a bit of a sacrificer always trying to help others. Having your closest family slowly watch you slip away is brutal for them.

Hopefully Ill go after leaving thanksgiving with everyone so we could say goodbye and I get into a fatal car wreck or something. I think that would be easier for everyone. Best of both worlds?