i was always told to be that way as well, but my grandpa was a cop. i find that if you're cooperative and say as little as possible, it's generally easier to stand your ground later, should anything get invasive.

i have told this story before in another thread, but it seems relevant here, too. i was pulled over on a road trip across the US, having to drive from one coast to the other in less than three days. i was traveling with my boyfriend and cat. i got pulled over in arkansas for following too closely to a semi-truck. i didn't really think i was, but i simply said, "sorry about that, i didn't realize." he then lectured me on how dangerous it was to do that, especially in a car as small as the one i was in and i simply nodded and agreed. he then looks into the car (it was pretty full of stuff) and looks over at my boyfriend in the passenger seat. he had been asleep up until we pulled over and was sitting the seat back up and putting his glasses on. he asked my boyfriend if he was okay and he said, "yes sir, was just asleep when you pulled us over." the cop then asks me to get out of the car. i didn't know why he chose to do this and i'll admit that it made me uncomfortable. i asked, "is there something else wrong?" "just go ahead and step out of the car for me and we'll have a chat. bring your license and registration." i'd never had it go like this and i was really sick to my stomach. i hate confrontation and this guy had an attitude and was set on something with me and i wasn't sure what it was. to be frank: i was a 20something (at the time) white female and my boyfriend is a 30something white male. we had california plates.

i stepped out of the car with my license. he had me walk over to his car with him, "so the camera can see you" and i waited while he ran everything. we were in a rental car, so it took a little bit longer for him to confirm things, but when he was done, he asked me bluntly: "if i bring search dogs down here, will i find weed in your car?" i was taken aback. i didn't have weed, didn't even smoke cigarettes, and could think of no reason, other than the fact that i have bay area plates, that he would assume i had weed. but once i saw where things were going, i realized i needed to tread carefully. this midwestern cop saw me with my california plates with a full backseat and figured somewhere in all that, i've probably stashed weed. since everyone in the bay area smokes weed. i told him as forcefully as i could that there was no weed and why would he have any reason to suspect that? i admitted to following too closely and felt this was unncessary. "well, the guy in your car looks out of it and i smelled grass." i kid you not, there was a man mowing grass along the highway behind us. i wanted to say, "maybe because of that guy, you moron" but figured i didn't want to set him off. i just said, "i've been driving for two days, we've been trading off every few hours, he's was just taking a nap. we have no weed, but have to be in georgia by tomorrow afternoon." i was gently implying that i didn't have time for this bullshit, and after making me stand there while he confirmed my story with my boyfriend, he let me go with a warning. i was so shook up after that, we pulled off at a rest stop and i took a nap. i know that me being a white female with no record probably helped, but it was clear this guy had a preconceived idea about me based on my plates. i'm sure of it. he wanted to badly for there to be weed in my car or for me to be combative in a way that allowed him to search my car. i hated how it was more probable in his mind that i had weed than it was that we were just traveling a long way and my boyfriend was asleep. i felt guilty even though i did nothing wrong. admitting i followed too closely didn't deter the situation and i honestly feel like he saw my plates and found a reason to pull me over. i hate to say that, but it is what it is. i'm grateful i was let off easily after the initial situation, but i can't imagine how escalated it could've gotten.