I'm a cop, but I work for the busiest shift on a very busy city department, so nobody runs traffic. I haven't written a ticket since I cannot remember when. I think I wrote a guy a ticket last year because he was listening to his car stereo with his car parked in his driveway while he was seated in his living room. I told him he'd have to turn it down and he got very shitty, so I wrote him for a violation of the city noise ordinance.

We had a prick a few years back that came to afternoons trying to cleanse the city of drugs by stopping everyone and impounding every car he could. Of course, that led to the senior officers stuck running calls in the asshole's beat because he was turning in 6g of weed from some stupid traffic stop he'd been on for the last hour.

One week before Christmas several years ago, I saw him impound a beater because the driver (who was still wearing her retail work shirt because she had just gotten off shift) had a suspended license. Roughly one third of the drivers around here have suspended licenses, you could pull people over all day, it's a chickenshit ticket. When it became clear he was going to impound her car, I took him aside and said, "What are you doing? She's coming home from work. There are child seats in the back." He said, "Looking for drugs."

Of course he didn't find any, but that didn't erase the $300 that lady would have to pay in tickets/impound fees. Our sergant yelled at him when he got the report, asshole transferred to a different shift shortly thereafter. He's still trying to make a name for himself by doing the same stupid bullshit. He's a complete dumbfuck, but he's convinced he'll be chief some day. Goddamn, I hate that motherfucker.

Anyway, if I'm writing you a ticket, you must have fucked up in some unimaginable way, so there's nothing you can do.