Dating when you have ADHD and anxiety

I feel ya. I'm odd too. While I haven't been officially diagnosed with ADHD, I'm 70% sure I have it. I even done a quiz to diagnose myself and I was in the range of "you might have it". I'm also a professional nurse, I have heavy medical background and knowledge. To keep story short, I understand where you're coming from, and I have no solution, but just know there are other poor souls like you out there. My story is simple: I cannot relate to many people either. I have high expectations from people, mostly because I believe in "something special" for me out there. I haven't loved anyone in more than 4 years, and the guys who have paid attention to me I basically reject and then they start to hate me. Their ego is hurt and I don't care. I'm very impulsive and I try hard not to give in. And the guys that I did like more than friends, I have no idea how to communicate with them, and so...I let it pass me without making an effort to show I'm interested.

I also know right off the bat if someone is compatible with me or not. And most, I say no to. And then I don't even care where my life is headed! I also hate dating, and I've never ever been on a dating website, because I find them pathetic. I can only fall in love with a person I've known for a while and have liked or fantasized about.

I have these weird expectations from people. A few months ago a guy wanted to know me better and I said ok, I'll give you 10 minutes of my life (just to not say I haven't tried). I asked him when was his last relationship, and he said he has been in a relationships all his life. Few months at a time. In those 10 minutes I had a hard time following him and being interested in what he is saying. But from what I understood, he was desperate to have someone. In my head I was "dude shut up. I bet you money you want a woman just to clean your underwear, not to love her, and I bet you money you haven't loved anyone". To him the idea of "suffering" while in love was strange. But to make it clear, even if he said he had been suffering over somebody, would not have made me like him more. Why? I judged him in the first 5 seconds. I can't be bothered to be in a relationship or anything of that sort. Everyone falls short somewhere. I'm not perfect, I might have ADHD, as I said. And that is a hell of a diagnosis. But for someone to really AWE me, he has to be a hell of a persistent and constant person, with very very solid mind set. I feel ODD. People around me go on dates and find someone, and I set myself for failure because I know I'm odd and it's hard for me to keep interest.

I felt like sharing this off my chest, because I never talk about it.

/r/adhd_anxiety Thread