The last time I technically hung out with my three best/closest friends was on my birthday, last October. I wasn't planning anything big and all I wanted to do was lie down after school. They told me, during a class that most of us had together, that we were all going to grab some Chipotle together in celebration of my birthday.
I was fine with it, although a little frustrated that they didn't contact me beforehand so that I could pick the restaurant we would eat at. I thought it would be appropriate that I picked since it was my birthday. Also, I knew that one of my friends in our "clique" hated Chipotle, and I didn't want him to complain. I'm pretty sure they had only picked Chipotle because they had a craving for it.
After school, I had waited several minutes before all my friends came to our regular meeting spot at our school. It turned out that there would be two more people in our group; my friend's sister and an acquaintance, who I personally found annoying, but I couldn't bare leaving him behind.
When we left school to go to Chipotle, I was in the back of the group, listening to two of my friends having a discussion. I tried to include myself in it, but it proved difficult when I had to stop every time someone talked over me.
Once we arrived, everyone ordered their food. I ordered first. While everyone was still ordering their food, I found us an open table and arranged the tables (there wasn't any tables for six individuals, so I put three tables together). I was stuck on one end of the table with my friend's sister while my other friends carried on their conversation on the other end of the table. I put on a smile and didn't say anything negative because I didn't want to make them mad. I just sat their, eating my food while my friend's sister admired someone at another table.
When we were all finished with our food, I was hoping to hang out with my friends and maybe even play some videogames with them. I waited ten minutes for one of my friends to buy a burrito for his girlfriend before we left. When we left the Chipotle, everyone said that they were too busy to hang out, so we all went home. Two out of my three friends live near the same streets, so we all had a small conversation together on the way home. I said thanks before parting ways with them, even though I felt sick inside. That birthday was much worser than the birthday dinner I had to endure the previous year.
On the following Friday of my birthday, some acquaintances that I knew since first grade invited me to smoke marijuana with them. I had never smoked it prior to the invitation. I accepted their invitation, and they were quite surprised. I was the last person they would suspect of smoking pot. I was curious as to how using pot would feel, but the only real reason I tagged along with them was to that I would finally hang out with someone.
So, I spent my Friday after school with them. It was the funnest day I had in a while. We talked, we laughed, we smoked. I didn't get much of a buzz from the marijuana. They warned me that it's not as potent the first time you try it. These were people I resented for being degenerates, but I wanted to spend much more time with them. They actually appreciated my company and encouraged me to speak.
I was invited to smoke with them two more times. After that, I declined any further invitations over the fear of my grades slipping and the cost of pot. I had my defining moments of that entire year with that group.
Eventually, I told my friends about my "adventures" with marijuana. I didn't want to influence them, though. I felt that this was something I needed to get off my chest. One of my friends resented me for doing it, but he eventually got over it. It did hurt, though, when this friend told me that I should walk home with my "stoner friends" instead of him.
I still have my group of friends, but we've been more distant lately. They've chosen to play videogames rather than go outside.
With college around the corner (I'm going to be a senior in the next school year), I've been considering leaving home to go to a University far away. I don't want to be with the same friends, or stay in the same small town. I want to expand my social life on a college campus on the other side of my state.
This is going to be complicated since the universities I want to attend require high GPA/ACT scores. Although my grades and ACT score are above average, and I have some college credits from AP classes, I'm terrible. I have the potential to do great, but I've been depressed during my Senior and Junior years of High School. I don't expect to get into my desired schools and I can't bare attending any school worse than the ones I want.