Hello ladies. Husband of r/carlamonster and father of the soon to be Clementine. I'm certainly not here to put my wifes credibility up for debate but there are some things I should add to this conversation before you all completely dump on me and try to convince my wife to divorce me. Firstly, yes, I peruse this sub because I do care and I want to know more about babies and birthing. I do research occasionally on the whole process and im certainly not a deadbeat. I DO care about this girl about to be borne as much as I did when I found out I was having her. The thing is, I just don't show excitement or make some emotional display about it. Unfortunately having this child couldn't come at a worse time because the terrible schedule and just starting doesn't give me much time off and I have to travel at a moments notice. I also work rotating shifts and sometimes they are 12 hour rotations. Not only that but one weekend a month I have to drive 10 hours for my military obligation. This leaves me barely anytime for anything when I still haven't even fully gotten my new house all ready. The only reason I took this job was that it would allow my wife to take a year off and be there for our child and set us up for future success financially. Im not sure what you mean when you say "no support" when I pay the bills and and tell you im sorry about how the way things are and wish they were better for us. The reason I cant do "typical" pregnancy things is because my schedule and distance but I have driven the distance for a few appointments. Its NOT because I don't want to go to these appointments but because the schedule and distance. I have done my own research online about taking care of a baby. The only reason I haven't bought a monitor yet is because im waiting until I find one on sale that I like. I still have a few weeks before the baby is due, its not like I need it right this second. This goes with the shelf, its decorative I put it up yesterday, but it could have even waited a bit more. The birthday part. I told you I was going to see and you told me not to come. I was going to take you out to dinner. You told me not to come, I wanted to see you. And for the robe I thought it was a breast feeding robe so I didn't think you needed it so quickly, and then when I tried to order it you told me it takes three weeks to make and not to bother. I didn't think we needed it for the birth. This was my fault, I should have asked more questions about it. Yes, I said I would take care of her myself after some of the things that you told me, that were so terrible I don't even want to mention them here. I get frustrated with you because for the past few weeks every text and phone call is gloom and doom. I can only say "everything is going t be ok", "its all going to work out", 'things will get better when we're together" so many times before I lose it. I know youre stressed out and going through this alone and its less than desirable conditions but you're strong and I will be there when that girl is born. I hate using military examples, but ive had plenty of military friends that were gone during the birth and pregnancy and came home months after she was born. I think it would help if you found a way to channel your negativity rather than projecting it on me. I do ask about our child's health. I ask everytime how everything is and how she is. Even when I call almost every day, I ask how "our litte girl is". The main point is I want to make this work and continue to be with you and be there for our child. I know there are some things I need to work on but there are things you need to work on too. We both need to do this, I promise I will try harder.
TL,DR: Sorry about the way things are. I wish it were better. I want to make things work. I love you and Clementine. The cats miss you.