A few weeks ago I attended my ex stepdad’s sentencing hearing. He’d been assaulting boys for over three decades. Going into the hearing, I knew about victims as young as 12. During the hearing, the prosecuting atty mentioned one as young as 6 and I about fell out of my seat.

I was seated next to the mother of a victim from the nineties, and during a recess before the sentence was given, she told me about another victim she was aware of, who was nine months old at the time. Victim’s mother (assaulter’s fiancée) wasn’t interested in pressing charges. She just left the abuser, only for him to find another single mother to marry a year later (mine).

He was out and free and assaulting children for 26 years after that. His own mother pulled strings with her connections to get charges dismissed and records sealed. There are more people like this out there than you realize. One victim decides it’s not worth reporting, someone else tries but is unsuccessful. He was paying out a civil suit settlement to one family while I was living in his house as a pre-teen. Nobody stopped him until last year. This all took place in a small Midwestern American town.

(To be clear I am not blaming the victim who doesn’t report. As a rape victim outside this situation who also didn’t report, I get it, and it shouldn’t be your responsibility to stop your rapist from offending. Just recognizing there are a lot of forces working against sick fucks being put away like they deserve.)