Yeah, we talked about it a lot but he consistently failed to try and change his behaviors at all/get help. And to top it off, on the like once-in-three-months day he did feel like having sex, he’d get upset I wasn’t down when he out of the blue was like “Want to have sex?” And when i was like “of course not, you haven’t hugged me in two months, you haven’t called me pretty or expressed attraction to me in i don’t know how long, how am I supposed to get horny right now?” he cast this as me withdrawing from/rejecting him. Like I was supposed to be constantly open, emotionally vulnerable, and available with him, while him disengaging entirely for months at a time was meant to be fine because it’s “how he is” in his view.