I fucked up harder than I've ever fucked up before. Blowing of school to just to dick around, not doing my assignments, not studying.

Sounds like this is your freshman year. Don't be too hard on yourself, first year was really tough for me, too. I went to one of the best schools in the country and my parents paid for my education despite our shitty financial circumstances.

I come from a laid back city. My high school was a real crappy one. When I moved to a new, bigger city to study I finally realized I was a naive moron. Once I was in uni, I was one of the dumbest people in every darn class. Every darn class. I studied like I did in high school and it really wasn't working.

By second year, I kind of lost hope and thought that intelligence is something you're born with. I worked harder than ever, and finally saw some improvements.

By the time I was graduating, I was a straight-A student. Looking back, I think it was a miracle because I remember seriously considering either a) switching to an easier school or b) dropping out. But I couldn't imagine what my parents would think of me if I dropped out so I kept going forward and I'm glad I did.

Just remember that the freshman year is the most difficult part. You're still getting adjusted to the new environment and still learning to not rely on your parents.

As long as you change your study habit (you mentioned you didn't really study) you will do much better. Seek academic counselors at your school. Form a study group. Find smart people to study with. Piss off your professors and ask stupid questions. Don't give up just yet!

I just shed a tear onto my physics textbook.

Sounds like you're in physical sciences or engineering? Whatever it may be, just assume that easier major = difficult time finding job after graduation and vice versa... try to stick with your difficult major if you can. This doesn't apply if you're in the life sciences though ;P