I'm going through pretty much exactly the same thing. Seriously, I feel like everything you wrote is perfectly applicable to me.

I don't really have any advice on the grades given that I'm kinda in the same boat, but I figured that, hey, its at least comforting to be miserable together.

For what its worth, I'm coming back next year but have made arrangements to have my own room in gender neutral housing as I transition. If your school is good about trans issues, it may be worth talking to someone in charge of student life or something. So far everyone I'm working with has been really kind and respectful of my right to privacy, taking care not to disclose specifics to anyone even while requesting that I get my desired housing.

Just for reference, I'm at a small liberal arts college in the American Deep South, but they have already helped another trans person transition last year and he says everything has gone pretty well for him. Plus, I have a new trans friend who I can actually talk to safely about these things! That is really important and I think most trans people should be pretty accepting if you choose to confide in them, even if you didn't know them well beforehand. I only knew my friend from class but he's been really supportive and has made a great effort to make me feel comfortable. That said, I'm sure some trans people are jerks or might just not want to be signled out so don't out yourself to someone just because they are trans. In my case, some school official people sent him an email saying that a student was considering transitioning and asked if he would mind helping me through the process as a friend to talk to and he was really excited, no longer being the only trans person on campus.

So I guess, even if its scary, it might be worth talking about this with people who can help you. College is a great place to transition if your at a good college.

But yeah, the whole grades thing? I'm just as lost as you. I feel like its also related to my depression and the interplay between the two is horrible. A lot of trans people deal with both and it can be hard to sort out which is which. It might be worth talking to people just about that end of things if you haven't, and I also highly recommend medication if doctors think it could help. I know it makes me feel a lot better, though not perfect by any means.

Anyway, that was a lot of information but I'm sleep deprived because of a mix of stress from exams and sleeping on the floor of my new apartment as I wait for furniture to arrive. But I hope that helped in any way. Honestly, reading your post helped me a lot if nothing else. I definitely feel your pain.