So for the entire 5 year friendship, we were in contact almost exclusively online because we lived far apart - we briefly bumped into eachother a couple of times on the train in that time. So there wasn't much real life exposure, it was all text. He didn't just turn into a narcissist the day we started dating lol. And he asked many times for my support through those things yes, I was the one person he turned to following the binges for example. The day before this conversation, he reached out to me and said that he hasn't gone anywhere if I ever needed anything from him. It felt we were starting to rebuild our old friendship after our breakup, I felt invited to reach my hand back out to him as he did with me the day before, and say I still want to be here for him too. His casual sex addiction was a large reason for our split and there had been lying and infidelity. It was relevant to some of the hostility that'd built up. We haven't split up 'for good' and so it's tricky times staying friends through that when you know one person is sleeping with other people. I understand it but still it is just a sensitive issue. So in my mind, I thought showing him that my support for him on that stuff was still there, I thought that was kind and you know just showing you're there for someone still despite what's happened. Reading my message back I think it might've came across backhanded though. I have apologised to him for that. As for you saying I was being disingenuous, I don't feel I was, I really meant what I said, but I guess it came off that way too. He's told me incriminating and life ruining secrets about his best friends and so I was worried he'd share my secrets, I think it was fair for me to assert like hey I know we're not together anymore but let's not spread eachother's secrets, I wouldnt do that to you and I hope you won't do that to me. To me that's fair but I guess we'll agree to disagree there. And there's nothing to forgive, don't worry haha I don't post here to be told I'm right, I want to know the truth