Dog walks from one side of the room, knocks over everything in his path every heckin day. Dog gets chicken from a conventionally ungettable place. Leaves no trace except paper plates on the floor with no bones. He's a smart boy.

Edit: unrelated entirely, he's crate trained, but early on, to reinforce how cool the crate is I slept in there with him some nights. There is now a kitten who prefers to live with him now and insists on going in before I close them up for the night. I tried to cuddle and treat the kitten, and kitten loves us but he wanders in there regularly. What a sweet kitten. He sees himself as part dog I think. And puppy was raised by cats, who probably sees himself as part cat. Friends for life in the making