I'm still dealing with this with my partner. The last person had some very good points but I'll try to chime in.

Patience is key. Which it sounds like you have. The shame and guilt of all this is the most debilitating part. You really have to reassure her you're here for it all and she doesn't need to be ashamed.

Everyone has very specific emotional scars these abuses leave. So I don't feel I can really speak for her on how to make it better because that part needs to be communicated from her. All I can say is what not to do.

I just want to re-emphasize what the last person said. Never ever ever pressure her for sex. It's something my partner has unfortunately done to me a bit. I love him a lot and I think he might not understand fully. It just puts all these horrible thoughts in my head. Like I really am just an object meant for sex, even someone I love just only wants that from me. All men really just can't control themselves, how could someone claiming to be there for me not see how much I'm hurting. And maybe I don't really show how much I'm hurting because for a long time coercion was all I knew so I didn't know how to say no properly, so maybe he has gotten mixed signals.

So just really watch her human language and ques. See what she's saying when she's not using her words, and listen to it. A yes really, really needs to be a true yes.

You can pressure her to communicate. In my opinion survivors need to be pushed to tell the truth about their feelings. Sometimes they need to be pushed to even say "no." I didn't know how to say no because no used to mean consequences. a common issue with all survivors we hold our feelings in for so long about these things she might not even understand them fully. Push her to talk to you. Not do anything physically.

True communication can take a while. I told my boyfriend I enjoyed sex but I didnt because I didn't even know I was lying. Like I said all these scars are so personal and unique, i cant speak for her if this is her experience. But patience patience patience. Communicate communicate communicate.