Thank you for taking the time to answer. :)

I should have clarified that I'm okay with what happened, I don't believe it was a traumatic event whatsoever (at least in the traditional sense), but I do wonder how would I have been like if it hadn't happened. I can only assume of course, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be (as much) addicted to porn as I've been in the last 20 years. I guess I'll also go to my grave not having a clear answer about my sexual orientation 180º turn. But as you said, human sexuality is complicated and mysterious.

I've thought about the possibility that maybe he was abused, but I'm not sure... his father being a womanizer, conservative and the military type... I don't quite see it. But he definitely created a "too liberal" environment in his home regarding sex and porn. I mean, he didn't even block the porn channel on his 7 yo bedroom TV... for me that's just negligence. Not to mention the other stuff he openly talked about and displayed.

I'm sorry to hear about what happened to you, I hope you've made some progress since then. Pardon my question, and only answer if you're comfortable, but have you considered reaching out to him to apologize? There's a possibility that he didn't process it as a traumatic event so he could forgive you in a way? I don't know, just theorizing.