Peep Show.

Mark and Jeremy barricade themselves in their flat. They agree to have Big Suse over because she's scared. Jeremy wants Mark out of the way because he plans on seducing Suse and having hot secret bunker sex 'Like a sexy Hitler and Eva Braun, only without the genocide... and more testicles'. Mark refuses to leave the living room because he wants to watch a festive documentary marathon on the Stalinist purges on the TV.

After failing to persuade Mark to leave, Jeremy debates whether or not he should use the opportunity to kill Mark, before deciding to go ahead with it. As he sneaks up behind Mark, brandishing a knife, Mark notices him and turns around:

"Jez... What are you doing? Is - Is that a knife?"

"No..."

"Yes it bloody well is! You utter bastard, Jeremy! I can't believe this! You were going to kill me just so you could have Purge-sex with Big Suse!"

"Oh for God's sake, Mark, you always make a big deal about these things! It's not like I was going to really kill you! I was only gonna stab you in the... legs. You're so bloody selfish."

"Right, well, if you're going to stab me I'm going to bloody well make sure I stab you first!"

Snatches knife, stabs Jez.

"OW! That really fucking hurt! I'm going to stab you so much!"

Snatches knife back, stabs Mark.

"Holy fuck, Jeremy! That's really sodding painful!"

They both collapse on the floor.

Mark's perspective "I always knew Jeremy would betray me. I'm like Julius Caesar - if Brutus sat around all day smoking weed and wanking to Loose Women."

Big Suse walks in, takes in the scene, freaks out and flees.

"I'm sorry I stabbed you, Mark. You know I don't think these things through properly."

"That's OK, Jeremy. It all seems a bit pointless now. At least we wont be around for series three of the Fall."

"One last time for the El Dude Brothers? UHHH-UHHH!"

"UHHH-UHHH!"

Cut to credits. Season finale