You're not a court, a jury, or responsible for punishing anyone in the situation.

Our court system works that way because it MUST be impartial. You work that way because you're taking the easy way out of supporting victims and calling out a status quo that works for you.

"If you're wrong you can fuck up someone's life really bad."

Sure. Tell that to the Supreme Court. To convicted rapist Brock Turner. To the piles and piles and PILES of untested rape kits going back for years. You're flat wrong that allegations ruin lives unless you're talking about the lives of victims which are OFTEN ruined for coming forward by people like you who think it's their job to litigate the story.

There are so, so, so few false allegations and so, so, so many rapes. The fact of the matter is that believing victims helps them and hurts literally no one because no one is asking you to fight the rapist. Just help the victim. Get them support, hear their story, don't retraumatize them by trying to collect "proof" when it's not your fucking job.

If I knew you personally and you said that around me? I would mentally mark you as unsafe to tell, as I'm sure many survivors in your life have. When you don't support victims, you support their attackers. Being silent is being on the side of the oppressor/perpetrator.

But, hey, at least you don't have to do anything.