Yeah I think in the society we live in, most people are living unethically.
Going by the criteria you've presented, all people are.
Reducing harm yes, and working your way to the least possible harm.
Which would make me vegan. Especially if you don't consider killing to inherently be causing harm (again, humane killing, euthanasia, abortion, etc). Feed animals the vertical crops you mentioned and you're vegan, even if you kill and eat the animal.
Therefore, as long as I work towards animals being fed vertical farmed food (simply by donating or kickstarting) and buy meat from people who treat animals well before slaughter, I'm vegan. Because I reduce harm and am working towards the least possible harm.
in my example, what happens to the animal in the end, affects how people treat those animals.
Which is a problem of perception, not ethics.
but I know some pig farmers, and they specifically tell their children not to bond with the animals because you will feel bad when the time comes to slaughter.
That doesn't sound any different to a nurse not getting too close to a new hospice patient. They know they're going to die, that doesn't prevent them from treating them well.
It's also linking back to the difference between an animal you intend to keep as animal pet and an animal you intend to eat. Just because you're going to eat one doesn't mean you beat it, you can still treat it well while you spoil your actual pet.
and anything goes when it comes to competition.
That's horribly fundamental. Competition can mean anything from racing each other in Mario Kart to reaching for the last packet of tofurkey.
I am willing to kill someone who abuses animals.
According to your personal definition of abuse, it would seem. Which doesn't include baiting crops. But I assume includes baiting dogs.
I am also not opposed to killing an animal who tries to kill or harm me
I would assume you see the very large difference between killing something in self defence and killing someone who kicks a dog.
What this says to me is the only thing preventing you from killing people isn't ethics, but the law.