Six years ago when I was [20m], I was in a similar situation as you. I'm white and was dating an Indian girl who was first generation born here. We'd been friends for a year before hand but started hooking up and became an item, though we never labeled it.

She was mortified of her parents finding out. The guy she dated before me was Indian but was from s different part of India so she knew her parents would never accept him. They were neighbors and her parents didn't like him, even without knowing they were dating.

One time we went to a mall like 10 miles from her hometown (we met at college far away) and she didn't want to hold hands in case someone saw us. She was afraid of people who knew her family at our college seeing us in public. Couldn't do social media as well but I didn't mind, I was happy with her.

Apparently I would've been an embarrassment for her family or something in the Indian community in her neighborhood, even if her parents did accept me.

We were only together for a few months before the semester ended for the summer, and she had asked me if I'd be willing to meet her parents, and I was 100% down. A couple weeks into summer she used something else that's a story for another time, that would've been perfectly manageable, as a cop out and dumped me, all because she knew dating me would only bring pain to her family.

I was in love with her and honestly saw myself marrying her, but it hurt a lot less ending it then rather than a year from then.

You can't let this carry on anymore, your relationship basically has an expiration date hanging over its head, and its impossible for a relationship like that to thrive. You shouldn't have to hide on social media, you should be able to call his family your own. Fuck this guy, he's a HUGE pussy for not being able to stand up to his family.

Give him an ultimatum: the relationship is on hold until he tells his parents you're dating.