So the violence that left you bruised and crying.... I mean, this is a matter of degree and I wasn’t there, so I can’t judge. At some point you should leave and never look back. I can’t tell. You can.

But now, 5-10 years later. He could have left. Maybe he should have but he didn’t.

He is angry at a 25 year old that doesn’t even exist in this world any more. You are not damaged. You are not a worthless person. You made a bad decision a long long time ago.

You have value. You have worth. You are important. You’re feelings are important.

He needs to move on, with or without you.

Leave him. Make it clear that there is a line in the sand as of today. You both need a clean slate.

No longer should you fear his rejection. Make him fear yours.

You are right. He is wrong. No more apologies from you.