Not exactly the same, just full of idiosyncrasies that make it a chore to be with them as I have to make sure that they are always in the comfort zone of their current value system. That has been my experience. They calculate how anything that they do reflects on their perceived value every second of every day.

Something just simple, I was living in SFran, and I always thought it funny that no girl I dated would humor me in going to Sizzler. It was a test, I joking brought it up and the reaction from one girl kinda shocked me. It was my favorite restaurant when I was 5 years old, and the idea of going was something completely unfathomable for her to even humor, just going to once to check out was "NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN".

It's the bike helmet, it's the recycle bin, it's the organic, it's "The Secret" of positive thinking, it's yoga, it's all the other manifestations of keeping up with the Jone's Wife.

Brief explanation: Bike helmet-we use to ride w/o them for years, now unfathomable to not wear one going 10 feet.(hissy fit) Recycle bin- we use to throw away everything in the same bin, now it's all of a sudden MURDER if you accidentally throw something in the wrong bin..

Something once acceptable(Sizzler) and almost a prize to get is WAY to far below their acceptable standards. It's not about money for me, it's that I have to deal with someone else's restrictions when I DO NOT respect their group think of arbitrary acceptability standards. Do any of the girls that i dated know each other, nope, did i have the EXACT same conversation with each of them.....yes. Amazing how similar strangers can be.

My first was unique, open and the standard was only SHARED EXPERIENCE .....you know, like best friends.....But I'm sure that if I spoke with her husband, he'd probably say that she henpecks him into going to the farmer's market and that new restaurant everyone is raving about.

The whole process hurts me internally.