Oh god, this reminded me so much of what happened to me my senior year when I was high as a kite...

Story: At my school, we had off campus lunch and me and a few friends would sometimes smoke on the way back (stupid, but I was young and dumb). Immediately after lunch I had the ever challenging Art I class. The teacher of this class didn't particularly care for me, probably because I was a graduating senior and only took the class because I had to fill a schedule. She was nice enough to let us listen to music on our phones while we drew. I had got caught texting my girlfriend once before while listening to music, so the teacher watched me like a hawk. On this particular day, I was not stealthy and she caught me. I begged and pleaded but she took my phone and said I could pick up at the end of the day. No biggie I thought to myself and returned to my drawings.

Flash forward about 15 minutes when my high self realizes I have to leave school early to drive to my golf match today. It's also in bumfuck nowhere, so I need that phone if I get lost! I raise my hand and tell the teacher I really need my phone. I explain the situation and offer to talk to the assistant principal immediately. She denies me with the grin of the devil him fucking self. I ask to go to the bathroom (aka the principals office), but she's not that dumb. Most people would give up at this point, but I'm high and I want to sext my girlfriend.

I give it about five minutes and call the poor student TA from the local community college over. She didn't hear the previous conversation so she signs my hall pass for the toilet. I head straight to the front office. When I get there I start telling the secretary about how I lost my phone by texting, but that I really need it. Two teachers hanging out up there hear the situation and are very sympathetic. The four of us decide which assistant principal will be the most understanding and they give her a call. She tells them to send me on back, so I head to her office. She meets me at her doorway and I start explaining the situation. Before I finish, a voice pipes up from the office next door and says, "hold on one minute". My heart fucking drops. It's the real principal, and I'm too high to deal with all this shit right now. But she's coming out regardless to hear about my situation. She listens to my whole story and says I don't need my phone because I can just ride the bus to the golf match.

I politely wait for her to finish and tell her there's just one problem...the school doesn't give the golf team its own bus. We all drive ourselves. Rather than deal with that issue, she decides we are going to get my phone. So me, the vice principal, and the principal all return to my classroom. The principal tells me they won't say anything and I have to ask the teacher myself. So I do. She comes outside and I ask for my phone back and explain the situation with her boss and her bosses boss standing behind me. She gives me my phone back with a shit-eating grin and makes me promise that I will never use it again. I do. Everyone parts ways and I return to class with my phone back in my pocket. I ride on cloud nine the rest of the day for outsmarting that art teacher while high! I even shoot my best round that year later that afternoon.

But like all things, what goes up must come down. I came down the next afternoon when I got called into a different administrators office. I have no idea what's going on. He asks me to tell him what I did, and I said I have no clue. Then he shows me my write-up. "Left the classroom without permission. Lied about going to the bathroom." I don't even know what to say, so I bust out laughing. My AP ask me what's so funny, and all I can say is "she got me." I respected her after my day in in-school suspension and never pulled my phone out again.