From the other side of this -- there's a difference in my husband asking me to sin versus asking me to do something I think is incorrect. I would be really against sending our kids to camp, and could make an argument for how it was "sinful," but I know perfectly well that it isn't a sin.

Convictions do matter. It isn't chaos to have convictions and not violate them. But we have to determine between preferences/interpretations and actual God-given convictions. If D_D converted to Presbyterianism, and I was still staunchly not, I don't think I would be sinning to "let" him baptize them. I think he would be sinning, but, sometimes you can't do a rotten thing about sinful husbands except pray. I would certainly be pleading with him ad infinitum and I could not participate in the service. But he could. And I would still teach my children what Scripture said; we don't distort the truth when we're commanded to, either. On the other hand, if I was PB and maintained PB convictions, it would be terribly wrong of me to be baptized as an adult. I would be doing something offensive to God Himself (if paedobaptism was true ;-)). I would be making a false profession of desire to be baptized. So many things. I would be participating in sin.

To me, that's the heart of the matter, not whether something is or isn't sanctioned by the church. All kinds of atrocities have been sanctioned by the church. And wives often don't have a choice about going to an unbiblical church to begin with. What really matters is that we obey God, not man. If God is clear (and He's abundantly not clear about sending kids to Bible camp), then we obey God, not our husbands, not our church.