It’s not you. It’s self-preservation and I don’t blame them one bit.
If you have the means and are serious about this, I would recommend traveling to a country where they don’t expect doctors to give a shit - either about themselves or you.
Sterilization is no joke. It’s an incredibly serious medical procedure that carries a lot of risk.
Expecting a doctor to take that risk on you without there being a legitimate medical condition - tells me you aren’t emotionally prepared for it.