He was my friend for more than five years and we met when we were in 5th grade. We hung out almost everyday at each other’s houses. We were really close and we had so many inside jokes that no one else understood, which led to us being considered the “weird ones” throughout school but we didn’t care because we were having fun.
In middle school, his parents got divorced and his mother got custody. He did not have to move or anything but his life really changed. HIs mother would be nice and caring and the scream at him for any little thing for no reason. His mother went back to school because she didn’t have a job and needed money to pay the bills and feed her three kids. She isolated him from me and forced him to take on the role of the father. He would cook dinner, clean the house, and get his young siblings ready for bed/school while his mother screamed about how “stressful” it was to go to college and be a full time mother. In reality, his mother would go to class a few days a week and spent the rest of her time watching day time variety shows until my ex-friend got home. She would say how he was like his father which she used as an insult. She mentally abused him, and she would do it right in front of me. I felt so bad for him and told him that he could come to me with his problems at any time. We would try to hang out whenever his mom was in a good enough mood to let him and he started going to church with me because he wanted an excuse to get out of the house and see me. At school or online, we would chat for hours about his problems and I would try to help him through it . His grades were falling due to the stress and lack of time from having to be a “father”. He seemed way too young to be worrying about the things that he had to.
By the end of middle school, I got back in touch with a girl that I had not seen since first grade. We instantly became friends again and I introduced her to my ex-best friend. We became the Three Amigos and we spent a lot of time together. Prior to introducing this girl to my friend, I told him that I had a crush on her and that I planned on saying something to her eventually. When he became friends with her, I told him that I was going to tell her about my feeling for her. He looked at me and said “Well I like her too so I think I am going to ask her out.” I was upset but I realized that my ex-best friend and this girl both had similar interests and would be a good match. I had a conversation with him and said that he since he really cared about her I only wanted what was best for him and her and that he should do it if it made him happy. I also told him that I did not want a girl to come between us and we agreed. I wanted him to be happy since he deserved something good in his life due to his shitty home life.
About a year later, my ex-best friend and his girlfriend (the same one) became really close. They talked constantly and were much like how him and I were prior. I found some other friends to talk to since I was feeling lonely and I became close with these friends too. My ex-best friend started to act jealous of them and made it obvious that he was not happy that I had other friends. I told him that I was starting to feel like the third wheel in his relationship and I wanted to give them space since I was being ignored anyways. He told me “fine” and then went back to ignoring me with his girlfriend. We both became busy with different people and we never made time for each other. When I did try to talk to him, he was condescending to me and he acted like he knew everything. When I would talk to other friends, he would belittle me in front of them. I shrugged it off knowing that it might have to do with how he was treated by his mother and that he needed an outlet for his anger. HIs girlfriend and I were still close friends and she did not really notice that fact that he treated me like this. She also did not notice that he was a different person in front of her and when they weren’t together. I noticed he lied more and that he was just a really different person. HIs girlfriend bought out this fake side to him where he had whatever opinions his girlfriend had. I pointed this out to her and she didn’t believe that he acted like this since she told my ex-best friend that she wanted him to be genuine. I just kinda said whatever and did my own thing.
A few months later, he stopped hanging out with me and his girlfriend for no reason. It was literally a night and day change. One day he talks with us and then the next, he talks to other people. I was irked with him for ignoring me and then abandoning me. Then one day, he walks past his girlfriend and I at lunch holding hands with another girl and giggling. I saw her face and it was full of hurt. She tried to pretend that she didn’t see this (I found this out later). Later that day I confronted him. I asked him who this other girl was and why he was holding hands with her. He told me “Well (name of his girlfriend) and I broke up. So…” I just said ok and talked to him for a second before walking away. I figured that maybe his girlfriend and him did actually break up and that I just didn’t know. I called his girlfriend and told her the story. She cried and was really upset. I confronted her all that I could, while being disgusted at the actions of my ex-friend. Him and his girlfriend never did break up and he was actually cheating on her with this other girl for a while.
The months after day were bad for my friend (the girlfriend of my ex-friend). She had issues with depression because she came from a family that was even worse than my ex-friend’s and this breakup made it worse. She told me later that she even cut herself for a while because she was just so hurt. Seeing what my ex-friend did to my friend made me enraged. I saw her struggle with depression become harder and she had less of a will to fight against it. I saw her become torn up inside. He was her first love and they were really close. I was hurt seeing that my ex-friend was capable of doing such horrible damage on someone that trusted him.
One day I was just fed up with this. I typed up a message on Facebook and told him what I thought of this whole situation. I told him about how he treated me while he was dating this girl and that I had never been bad to him. I also told him that what he did to this girl was terrible and that if he did want to break up he should of had the decency to at least tell her instead of flaunting around a new girl in front of her. He told lies to me and tried to justify his actions. I just told him “We have been friends for a long time, but I don’t think that I can be around a person that acts like this.” He asked what this meant, and I told him that we won’t talk or hang out anymore. I also told him that I did not want to hate him or become his enemy. He said ok and then blocked me on Facebook.
I still see him every day at school and he has changed yet again. He has a new style and new opinions on life. He had gone through several other girlfriends and has pushed away old friends. I still think about that good times we had together and how I kinda want them back. I also think about how he still goes through trouble at home. HIs Dad is now trying to claim custody of his and his siblings and I know that it must be hard for him. I hope he has someone there to help him. Though I worry about him still, I no longer want to be friends with him. I am now best friends with this girlfriend and other friend and I could not be happier. Though it hurts to get rid of someone that you have been friends with for so long, it feels better to know that I have better friends who treat me much better.
TL;DR: He was my best friend for a long time, and he pushed me away and gave his ex depression after cheating on her. He did not show remorse.