Teacher told me I deserved my bullying. I never reported that I was bullied. I was too proud and tried to play it off like it wasn’t a big deal. She just caught wind of it and took the initiative to let me know that I “ deserved it”. Ok thanks.

More or less was the same tacit message I got from most teachers my junior and senior year. No idea why. I kept to myself for the most part, and was a harmless shit. but seemed like I was generally disliked, especially by the faculty it seems. I’m gay but masculine and wasn’t out even to myself back then. Maybe they just picked up on the “differentness”. Very small rural town with a lot of bitterness. The principle started to catch on I think. He wasn’t born and raised in the town and was a racial minority. He set up a meeting with me one day. Was one of the strangest conversations I’ve had. He didn’t want to directly say what he wanted to get across: get the fuck out of this place. Go to college far away. This town isn’t what the rest of the world is like. One of my teachers told me he had started making them address me by my first name instead of my last. He left the year after I graduated.

I really internalized that I deserved the treatment I got. My biggest regret from that time is that I didn’t know that I could have just picked up a phone and called the police the instant I was assaulted. We still don’t let kids know that it’s illegal for someone to grab them or shove them without their permission. Most bystanders who see an adult getting shoved call the police. For whatever reason it’s not seen as a big deal when kids are assaulted by their peers. Tomorrow on your way to work, pick out a stranger who is about your age. Shove him against the wall. Shove him every day for the next 4 years. See how long you get away with that for.