Be it more extreme and dubiously effective forms like Makhnovism (because Makhnovia sucked, I guess, I'm not a historian), Renéism (because that totally didn't drag Seychelles from a backwater to being one of the world's most developed nations), or tried-and-true forms like Nordic-style social democracy (because Sweden is the world's worst country to live in)… socialism is not in the best intere$ts of our share- er, fair American people. And hence the American people must be educated on the dangers of this foreign idea, and its opposition must become a patriotic duty.

Don't you understand, capitalism is the economic order that brings progress, quality, and choice!