It was mine. I suffer from bipolar disorder and I was on a medication that is known to have a possibly terrible reaction. Well, it was bad. I genuinely believed that people were out to get me and everything everyone said was a lie to try and shut me up. I accepted that I should have been hospitalized but I didn't know exactly when would have been the right time to go. I had constant intrusive thoughts of wanting to slit my wrists, even at work when I was with others. Nobody knew what I was going through unless I told them, in which case they were scared for me. One night I wanted to grab my pocket knife and slit my wrists. I went to jump out of bed for it but my boyfriend stopped me and physically restrained me. I screamed at him to let me go but he held on tighter. I fought for a solid half hour and it took me another hour to calm down. He never let go. I knew I couldn't stay on that drug. I was on a high yet suicidal. It's a very dangerous combination. I didn't recognize myself. Nothing felt real. All I knew is that I wanted to slit my wrists. After I quit the drug things went back to normal, which is depressed, anxious, and a little unstable. So much better than the delusional manic mess I was. It was scary. I've never been though anything like that before. Afterwards I was ashamed and apologized profusely to those who I was close to but they were all just thankful I was fine.