I've never written any poetry before but I hear writing your thoughts and emotions down can help with depression so here goes.   My Morning Routine   Wake up with a familiar pain in my stomach
I know it’s just gut rot, so I grab the bucket
Eardrums shatter as a voice screams fuck it
Alive another day, hate it or love it
  Wash away the stale taste of last night
Close all the curtains, it’s always too bright
Sober up enough just to get my mind right
Back to bed, I’m too weak to fight
  Close my eyes, then by darkness I’m devoured
This is it, hammer cocked, zero-hour
Naked on the floor, gun in hand, I cower
Open my eyes, just enough time for a shower
  Stagger onto the bus where the real torments start
Silently I sit, picking my brain apart
My mind is racing, thoughts dart
Stomach pain makes its way to my heart
  Still seeing double but it’s all the same to me
Single, double, I’ll take none if it’s free
They say this is a great place to be, get a degree
To achieve happiness, that’s the key, well I disagree
  As my vision stabilizes the pain starts to grow
How bad will it get? Fuck if I know
Distract myself and go with the flow
I didn’t know a person could feel this low
  Here come the flashbacks to a hospital ward
Scrambled gibberish carved on a chalkboard
A Spartan warrior wielding a Samurai sword
They make no sense, stay distracted, count the floors
  Is that one tall enough? Turn up the music
Make sure it’s upbeat or I might lose it
Lucid states becoming ever more elusive
Convinced life and happiness are mutually exclusive
  The rooftops start calling my name
Calming music, Tribal Seeds, fall like the rain
Think to myself that I can’t complain
Just 8 more hours then I’ll ease the pain
  I’ll lose consciousness, can’t call it sleep
Wake up to the same alarming beep
Feel a familiar pain as my stomach bleeds
Pull out a gun, rinse, repeat