I can't speak for everyone, but I'm not really a good person. I'd like to be. I feel guilty that I'm not, and yet, given most opportunities I innately end up not being. I don't want to say it's always a choice as a lot it is fueled by anxiety and neuroticism--needing things to go a certain way or else I'm at a loss as to what to do--that sort of stuff. Most of my worst behavior has been under the influence of alcohol where I'm not even conscious,and so I try not to drink anymore, at least until I'm in a better place where my train of unfiltered thought/"conversation", if you wanna call it that, isn't so negative.

Judging by your post you don't sound like a bad person, at least I doubt you are.