I spent the late summer feeling suicidal, and even though I had been in sh recovery I started slipping up again. My bf lost his patience with me over my self harm and told me there was no excuse for it to still be happening and gave me this really insensitive lecture, and then he broke up with me a few hours later. The breakup propelled me into a healthier mindset almost immediately, it was like this huge mass of guilt and pressure was lifted off my shoulders. After talking through the breakup in therapy it became obvious how bad the relationship was for my mental state and how feeling constantly insecure with him was taking a toll on me, even though we cared about each other a lot and were doing our best. I'm just saying this because I feel like I could have written this post right before he broke up with me, and i'm so glad I didn't give up. Sometimes all you need is to create a new set of circumstances for yourself to deal with in order to regather and start healing again. I'm not saying break up with him, but for me the breakup ended up being the change in circumstances that I needed to start being ok with myself again.