The Rescue of Sketchmaniac: A Elder Scrolls story
by Phrastus of Elinhir
/u/CyanPancake was enjoying a nice cup of coffee before the adventure started... /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis woke up one day and discovered that he was goth. his parents had come to him and told him that he was really adopted and was in fact the decadent of the fallen angel!
So now knowing that /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis was the relative of the great duke of the night, /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis saw that he had to change everything about him because he was not really what he thought he was.
But luck would have it that /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis's best friends /u/CyanPancake and /u/Sketchmaniac had heard the news of /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis's parents and that they had arranged to accompany /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis on his journey to find himself. First stop....the shopping centre
At the shopping center /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis went to all the cool black clothes stores. Now that he was really a half vampire, or as his parents told him, a dhampire (a/n: really, that's what they're called!), his parents had given him a credit card with ulminited funds to become his true self!
But /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis was really actually very drepssed. It was really hard to suddenly discoger that your parents had lied to you all those yaers and it wasn't made it any better by /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis suddenly remembering a horrible thuing of his past. /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis was sexkually abused! And now ngasta_kvata_kvakis also remembered by who but he didn't dare to tell /u/CyanPancake and /u/Sketchmaniac because he was afraid that thye would discover what had happened to /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis and why /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis was depressed!
while they were picking out black and red clothes and nail polish, /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis tried to fight his tears by listening to Evanessence. Because for the first time in /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis's life, he had the feeling someone understood his pain. So /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis listened to the songs in one ear while using his other ear to follow /u/story.
But it was so difficult because /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis.... really loved /u/Sketchmaniac!
/u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis knew these were wrong feelings to have because... younknow, it's /u/Sketchmaniac and their love would make life very difficult because /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis also remembered a prophecy that someone had told him in the past (before he was rapped) and that said that if /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis would ever fall in love with /u/Sketchmaniac, that then /u/AnElls would find them and kill them!
And as /u/was putting on some new blood red ankle spikes that went well with the dark black studded dog collar that /u/CyanPancake had recommended, /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis suddenly saw a glint in the distance and he knew instantly what it was: it was the diamond ring of /u/AnElls! She had come to haunt /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis and destroy /u/Sketchmaniac!
Arriving at the mysterious shack, /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis found that there was an item laying on the table in the shack. Around the shack was a mysterious circle drawn in sand or perhaps salt.
"Be careful" said /u/Sketchmaniac who as usually was cowardly squatting behind /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis. /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis carefully manuvred into the shack and on his tiptoes and scuttled forward. The floorboards beneath his feet croaked and /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis could hear a loud hummer coming from the table. There the laid. Right there for his taking.
But /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis was clever. /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis knew it was a trap!
So /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis said to /u/Sketchmaniac, "Why don't you take it, it looks safe."
And /u/Sketchmaniac was like "Oh, well, if you're sure, I will!"
/u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis slowly paced backwards and let him to do the taking. /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis knew that if it was a trap, /u/Sketchmaniac would be triggering it. And then /u/AnElls would get him, but not him.
/u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis knew /u/Sketchmaniac wouldn't mind sacrifcing himself for him. He always said that.
But forutnately when /u/Sketchmaniac grabbed the , nothing happened. Except they were cowardly attacked by Goon's!
They hoped into the shack and fired shurikons at them, but they managed the dodge them quite well (by hiding behind eachother).
They defeated them quite quickly, they were no match for them.
And then, suddenly /u/AnElls stood behind them. She held an old book in his hand and the in the other.
"I see you finaly found me, allthough it will not do you any good. You see, the is the last componant I need in the spell of Demonic Demonification. At last I will be one with who I admire most, I will have the true power - from the one that has lead me all these years. My one true ally... Satan: the Devil incarnated!"
Everyone gasped in horror as they were shocked. "Behold, prepare to knell before me, as the world soon will!" With that she spoke the evil words, and the ground shock and cracked, and the skys opened, and lava flowed over his body and then she was Satan!! Suddenly, /u/Sketchmaniac (who was playing dead) lunged at Satan, grabbing the off him
With the spell broken, this gave /u/ngasta_kvata_kvakis time to stab satan in the eye sending him back to Hell!
"Our work here is done"
With that, they all went home, safe in the knowledge that Satan was gone and GOD was protecting them all along.
The End