I love your attitude about the situation. It would have been easy for you to dwell in a mindset of self pity and not do anything about the situation, this is what many people do and unfortunately many never make it out of this way of thinking.

Instead you chose to do something about it and the bright side of it all is that if that stuff hadn't have happened you might not have ever gone through with intense therapy to work through some of those other issues you talked about. I'm a recovering addict/alcoholic and in AA we have a term called being a "grateful alcoholic" and it's pretty much exactly what you described.

No matter how fucked up our lives were, no matter how much destruction and pain we've created in our lives, we can be grateful that it led us to a place where we pretty much had to work through it all.

I had a pretty fucked up childhood. I was abandoned by my parents at birth, only to have my biological mom come back and try to take me from my adoptive parents home, which scared the hell out of 6 year old me and after she lost the custody battle she ended up sexually abusing me. She was unfortunately not the only one who did this to me either. Fast forward to my teenage years and I got into the drug scene which led me to picking up a nasty addiction to heroin that made me contemplate killing myself multiple times.

Today I'm almost 16 months clean and I wouldn't change a single thing I did or a single thing that happened to me because if I hadn't experienced all of it, I would have absolutely no reason to confront and work through the intense feelings of abandonment, rage, depression and anxiety that I had and I wouldn't have the peace and joy that I have today.

I don't mean to make the focus of this about me, I say all of that because I want you to understand that I truly admire you for having the courage to work through your demons and to have the attitude you do now. Don't ever give that up OP!