I am comparing judgement, not trauma. That is not comparison of trauma.

For the sake of this discussion let's assume that we're always talking non-violent rape and there is no physical damage. Actual physical trauma can lead to more PTSD-like symptoms, whereas non-violent abuse leans towards mental trauma and shame.

You're saying that the judgement levied against men when they share their story of rape or abuse is worse than the judgement levied against women. I disagree. I agree that it is different (and worse in some aspects), but I do not think it's quantifiably worse on the whole. I know I can provide hundreds of sources on how female date rape victims are judged, questioned and categorized, but I'm sure you're aware of this. So I was hoping you could provide some data on how the reaction that men face is worse, not just different.

Relying again on stereotypes, it's largely assumed that the woman is the victim and the man is not. If a victim's story happens to go against those norms, then it is often poorly understood. But isn't it inherently traumatic to be categorized as a poor/abused/tainted victim as it is to assume the victim wasn't really raped? If we look at the case of statutory rape, the young girl is always seen as a victim and the young man is generally viewed as lucky. That mentality and reaction inherently taints (or improves) the victim's perspective on the situation in a mind over matter type way.

This is an immediate change in relationship. That's not gender roles, and it's obtuse to say so.

OK. I'm not sure how you think you made that clear in your post (you said "visceral" which I asked about and then mentioned hugging), but can you provide some sources regarding this?

Your discussion of chemical rape, etc, is tangential to the conversation, and I will as such not be discussing it. I will state, however, that it is a textbook example of comparing trauma.

I'm not sure what you're actually responding to. I said "non-violently through coercion or intoxication"...? If someone is restrained or attacked physically, then it is a violent rape. If they are scared into having sex, then it's coercion. This distinction is necessary because there are differences between mental scars and physical damage, not because I'm trying to prove which is more traumatic to the victim.

I do know what I'm talking about, and I've seen a lot of it.

And I would say that your sample pool is giving you skewed data. First of all, you're only dealing with those who actually sought mental health support, so this would skew your results towards extreme situations, mental trauma or abuse. I assume from your tone that you deal with both female and male victims... yet this will also skew your data. Women make up the vast majority of abuse victims, and therefor have many resources available for dealing with that trauma... Men have almost none; you're often probably the only person they've told (or will tell). Once again, this is different not worse.