This might not make sense because I'm high, but I want to share it anyways.

I was born here in the US, both my parents are Mexican. I have always felt a deep pride and gratitude in being American. I have experienced some challenges my parents have had to face, like prejudice. The only reason I'm sharing that is because despite things like that, I have always known what real Americans are, and the negative things I have experienced never represented those real Americans.

Lately I've been feeling shame and disgust. Some days I really question this image I've had my entire life of what it means to me to be American. Even when Donald Trump was elected president, I remember thinking about our system of checks and balances. Not only that, I expected Trump to switch from the public image he portrayed throughout his campaign, I expected him to take his time in office seriously. President of the United States of America- being taken as nothing more than a job title.

Honestly, it's made me feel sad. I feel a weight in my chest when I think about it too long. This may seem like I'm being very dramatic, but it's a real internal struggle that I've been having for a while. I haven't told anyone, not even my SO of 7 years that I share everything with. I'm really hoping the investigation leads to something, because that would make everything instantly right again. If Trump walks away after playing and betraying our country, I'm seriously going to have a full blown identity crisis.