I would have an important conversation with my brother first off I would say it like this:

"I want to understand why we don't get along. I always spent all of my time thinking about how much you must hate me that I ignored how much you hate yourself. I hate myself too. Our step father hates us and he belittles both of us constantly. He justifies his behavior with stories of his worse off childhood abuse but he doesn't realize that he's a horrible fucking father.

"I know this sounds confusing right now coming from me but please understand that I truly genuinely understand heartbreak and I'm the perfect person to go to if you ever feel like nothing matters but that one person. Our parents provide us with simple anecdotal solutions that worked for them whereas you're genuinely struggling with depression and you need better anwers to your struggles than 'just try harder' or 'god will help you with it'. Lazy fucking parenting. And they wonder why you and I are Atheists. Don't trust their advice.

"I look up to you big time and losing you means losing the most important person in my life that went through the same bs that I had to. And for fucks sake you deserve to hear this but the Saga is amazing and no one tells you that. Fuck this world."

Along with talking to my brother I would speak to an ex-friend of mine and basically tell them everything that happens in the future to drive us apart because I feel like they deserve the truth.

Other than that just take care of myself a little better and get through high school.