I don't understand what it means to be transexual/ why gender exists. It's just something that I really struggle to relate to personally

I know that's controversial so I'll quickly add that I'm in no way saying that there's anything wrong with being transexual or that it even needs to be justified or whatever. And I apologise in advance if I accidentally cause offense.

So, I get that sex is anatomical while gender is psychological, but I don't get what it means to psychologically be a man or a woman. For me I see myself as having a male body because I've got male parts, but my thoughts and feelings are just me, they're not related to being male or female they just come from being me. Or to out it another way I don't understand thinking you're in the wrong type of body- to me it's just the meaty flesh suit I'm wearing. Sure there are bits I'd change, but I couldn't imagine thinking there was a right body type for me- if it was a female flesh sack that'd be fine too.

I also get that there are behaviours that are more common in one gender than in the other but at the same time it's entirely possible to have an extremely feminine personality and still be male (or vice versa) so that doesn't help me understand gender either.

I think the closest thing I can relate to is actually pronouns. As a man I'd find it pretty jarring to be referred to as a 'she' but part of me feels like that's just because I've been conditioned so it's what I'm used to and I've only ever been described as a she as an insult.

I guess ultimately it doesn't matter if I don't understand- if you just treat everyone the same most things work out fine. Still, would be nice if one day I could finally wrap my head around it though.

(Again, sorry if any of this caused offence. It very much turned into a random stream of thoughts so feel free to point out if there's anything inappropriate in it so I won't repeat the mistake)