What is the saddest detail about your life that no one knows?

A year ago I broke up with my bf of 3 years because I felt like I needed to be on my own, strengthen my mind and be more independent because I had grown so completely dependent on him. I recognise that that was a brave thing to do, and so many people don't do that and stay in relationships for fear of being alone. I know all the reasons for breaking up, but 3 months after we broke up (after he continually refused to let me break up with him because he believed we were soul mates and perfect for each other and completed each other) he found a new girlfriend, moved to England for her, then brought her back here to Australia. I since have not been able to find any connection to anyone that was that meaningful, and I feel like I threw something amazing away because I wanted to explore more people, while he has found someone new and everything that was maybe missing in our relationship even though he never thought there was when we were together. I feel crippling loneliness, but recognise I don't want to just jump into a relationship willy nilly because I don't think I could survive that kind of hurt again. A year on and he comes into my thoughts almost daily, where I don't think he thinks about me at all. I feel such an immense sense of failure and like I'm completely unlovable and I'll be alone forever, even though I was the one to end the relationship. I don't feel like I've made any progress in terms of getting over him and like I'm stuck in this horrible cycle of feeling completely heartbroken and betrayed and wondering why I haven't found anyone, and why I can't move on or stop thinking about him. I'm afraid he was the love of my life and I let him go thinking he wasn't enough, but then I have to reason and remind myself why we broke up etc, but then it's just an endless cycle where I feel good one week, and completely crushed the next. I'm just so tired of feeling this way. Meanwhile I've thrown myself into uni work and my art, and so feel accomplished in that sense, yet come home to an empty bed and feel so alone. I've tried dating apps and have been on them for almost a year and still haven't connected with anyone.

/r/AskReddit Thread