Probably will get buried, but fuck it. I pulled a hat trick one night. Had sex with three women in the same day.

My home town won the Super Bowl one year. Had some friends down from Austin that were in town to party and watch the game. This city is already know for being a party town. That morning, one of my friends with benefits had spent the night, we had sex that morning, she told me to have fun that day and she left.

My friends and I pregame all day downtown. I wind up meeting up with a really hot co-worker who wanted to tag along with us to the bar we were planning on watching the game. The bar's packed, everyone's having a blast. We're getting hammered, but hot co-worker is downing crown and sevens like they're going out of style. About an hour into the game she starts grinding on me. It was a little weird at first grinding on a girl while watching the Super Bowl, but I was drunk, so I grind back on her, and next thing you know we're making out. A little before halftime, her hands are in my pants, and she's trying to jerk me off in the middle of the packed bar. My friends are just staring at me, not knowing what to say. I lived about six blocks away from the bar, so I tell my friends to stay put, I'll be back before the end of the game.

Her and I get to my apartment, I turn on the game, and we start going at it in my living room. She's a wild cat, scratches my back and chest all up to shit. By the time we're done, it's the beginning of the fourth quarter and she's still sloppy drunk. She also has to be at work back downtown in ten minutes.

We jet out of my apartment, I run/drag her to our place of employment, drop her off with one of the door guys (she was his problem then), and high tail it back to the bar my friends are still at. Walk into to the bar to a round of high fives, with eight minutes left in the game. Home team winds up winning, the whole bar goes apeshit, and everyone spills out into the streets going nuts.

We really didn't want to be stuck in the most dense area of downtown, we realized everyone and their mom was going to be migrating down there to celebrate, so we huff it about a mile away from downtown to a much hipper area. We knew it was going to be packed there too, but not I can only move with the crowd packed. On the way, we're high-fiving everyone we pass, joining the crowd in chants and singing. It was amazing. Grown men were crying in the streets. People in business suits were hugging homeless people. The whole thing was surreal.

We finally get to our destination part of town and it's chaos there also. A little more reserved than downtown, but it's still packed. I'm shit house drunk at this point. My best friend and I have lost our Austin friends, but fuck it, we're still partying. I start up a conversation with a blonde at the bar (she looked like a nine at the time, but was probably more of a seven) while we're both waiting on drinks. She mentions she lost her friends, I buy her a drink, we talk for a while, and then she asks me and my friend if we party. Now we're in the women's bathroom of this live music club doing lines of, uh, party. One of her girlfriends finally finds her at this bar. Her friend and my friend hit it off. We're all dancing to a brass band on the dance floor, when she asks me if I want to get out of there.

Her place is four blocks away from the bar. We stumble into her apartment, do some more lines of, uh, party, and then we're getting hot and heavy on the couch. She's straddling me, her shirts off, her massive tits are out, and she looks down at me and says, "Would you mind if I called you [insert first name of the quarterback that had just won the Super Bowl]." I was a tad thrown off for half a second, but realized, fuck it, I don't give a shit, you can call me Shirley at this point. We go at it. She's yelling out the name of the quarterback. We progress into the bedroom and she's still calling me the quarterbacks name. This goes on for about an hour and then we pass out.

I wake up before she does the next morning and jet the fuck out without waking her up. Call up my friends to meet me for breakfast and a bloody marys. They all had a good time that night, but none of their stories were even close to touching mine.