I can't afford to be picky when it comes to people's appearance, since I'm so socially inept I can barely make friends - 25 years of undiagnosed Asperger's are the social equivalent of a thermonuclear warhead dropped on New York City or Tokyo, they fuck shit up. In fact, I tend to develop small crushes on almost anyone who's decent looking and has a nice personality, if I can talk to them like a normal person and not like, you know, my usual socially challenged self.

However, there are small things about people's appearance (girls and women at least, as far as I know I'm neither bi nor gay) that can make said small crushes degenerate into something truly horrifying - daydreaming about someone while they're right next to you is the kind of thing one would expect from either 15 year old girls or date rapists, after all.

Small things like looking cute but somewhat unconventional (it doesn't matter how many people call Maisie Williams ugly over the internet, for example, I think she's by far the best looking member of the cast of Game of Thrones, above even Natalie Dormer; and before Minzy, the former 2NE1 member - the one who got called ugly by her own mother - got stuff done to her face like 99% of K-Pop singers, I reblogged the hell out of her pictures on Tumblr), or resembling an awkward librarian or even more awkward fangirl as much as possible: glasses, messy hair, having a slight bit of surplus weight, dressing like they picked clothes in a thrift store while blindfolded, etc.

They're all details that, somehow, make people of the opposite sex (and people of the same sex too, to a lesser extent) seem like I can actually relate to them, and talk to them without fearing that they might think I'm a bother at best and disgusting at worst.

It's like their appearance says something like, "I'm not like all those other menacing, scary, threatening people, you can actually feel comfortable and safe around me". I know, I'm weird, and I will forever be alone.